baphijmm: (bring it)
( Jan. 2nd, 2011 11:25 pm)
Things have been getting better since my last post. The very next day, they actually let me sleep in until I was rested. The next day was similar. I managed to calm down a lot and got a few more applications out. I haven't really had a chance to write yet, but that will come, I'm sure.

New Year's was pretty fun. Stayed up watching X and playing Donkey Kong Country Returns with Cameron, my little brother. For some reason, most of my family decided to go to bed before midnight. Oh yes, we watched Alice in Wonderland that night as well, the one directed by Tim Burton. I was surprised, I'll admit; I expected it to blow goats, but it wasn't bad. Wasn't stellar, but wasn't bad.

My sister Kimber is in Costa Rica for two weeks, something for school I think. She left a few days ago. I don't remember if I mentioned that here.

Plans yesterday included running a few errands, followed by a movie; however, we ended up getting through everything too late to catch a matinee. As such, we ended up going this afternoon. The discussion involved Tron, Narnia, and Harry Potter; however, we decided on Black Swan. Initially, I was quite happy with this decision; I didn't much want to see the others, and this one involved ballet, a medium of storytelling I've always adored. After seeing it however, I wonder if my time might not have been spent better elsewhere.

The acting, for the most part, was pretty good. Natalie Portman was clearly not in her element for most of it, but she really pulled it out for the second half; I was absolutely blown away. Mila Kunis' acting was also stellar. Winona Ryder, for the moments she was on-screen, was pretty good, too. The guy who played the company head was complete crap. His presence alone manages to destroy a lot of the movie; however, it could have been worked with if a number of other things weren't wrong with it.

The script wasn't too bad; the overall plot was actually pretty good, even. In spite of this, there were many moments that felt... incredibly forced. Most of the sex scenes were like this. I mean, it could have had sex scenes with little problem, but... I mean, these were just poorly-written.

Finally, the one thing that I couldn't keep my mind off of the entire movie - the direction. I'm not sure I've seen a worse-directed film except maybe Gas-s-s-s-s! Now, to be fair, I don't go out and see a lot of indie movies, but wow. About the only good thing I have to say about it is that they actually managed to frame the shots fairly well. Their equipment was obviously sub-par, and yet in spite of this they spent good money on a decent computer for some of the graphics. Much of what made the movie actually enjoyable could have been done much better, and a lot of the symbolism was shoved down your throat. I mean, yeah, it was obvious the company head was representative of Rothbart from the ballet; he didn't need to transform into him for a second while fucking Lily. Nina's growing paranoia and absorption by her obsession were okay, but, again, they could have been portrayed so much better.

Overall, I might recommend it to some people just to see their reactions; however, I don't think I would ever spend money on it.

So exactly one opportunity has responded so far; however, it's far from set in stone - I've been invited to audition for an understudy role at a cabaret theater. This by itself would be no problem, except it's in the North San Francisco Bay area. As much as I would love to drop everything for this opportunity, I can't without something else to hold me up. I cant afford to fly out there for something like that only.

That having been said, more and more opportunities have been presenting themselves. I've been applying to them as I can; however, the excuse of "I'm visiting family for the holidays" for my address location on my resume is only valid, much less believeable, for really three more days. Additionally, I'm worried my father, who could easily make this happen, will refuse to help at all; as much as I have assurance otherwise from most everyone I speak with on the subject, he is quite certain that, even with a full-time job, I will be unable to pay for rent, utilities, and my debts. (Naturally, my response is, "If that were true, how the hell are there still so many people in California, and why the hell am I doing so poorly in New Mexico?", but he won't have any of that. But then, basic economics seems to go right out the window with most people I speak to about just about anything to do with money, so...) I think I can still pull it through if I call in a few favors, but, I mean, I'd have to do that anyway.

Anyway, I guess I just have to keep my fingers crossed. There is absolutely dick for me in New Mexico anymore; that much is blatantly obvious to me now. I've heard nothing from anyone I'd contacted prior to leaving, and it's been almost three weeks. Yes, I will be returning there for at least a day, and no, I do not wish to return to Cincinnati; however, at this point, I really don't want to have to stay in either longer than I really need to.

I just wish I could make decent money writing, sewing, or otherwise creating the way I love to. No one seems terribly interested in anything I do anymore, though. :/

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